Xenzodyar is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, unthoughtful pig.

Xenzodyar created a top quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xenzodyar, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Xenzodyar, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Xenzodyar's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Xenzodyar's Holy Commandments

1. Put Xenzodyar first in all things.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.

4. Never write about stars.

5. Never mention dolphins.