Lipgadhapjintom is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, cheerful swan.

Lipgadhapjintom created the Milkyway eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lipgadhapjintom, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Lipgadhapjintom, she will come to you in dreams.

Lipgadhapjintom's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Lipgadhapjintom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum gravity near swans while wearing indigo trousers.

2. Always wear fawn.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lipgadhapjintom.

4. Never bounce near doves.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.