Febquambom is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, passionate squid.

Febquambom created a strange quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Febquambom, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Febquambom, he will send you a sign.

Febquambom's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Febquambom's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Learn eight new languages a year.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity.

5. Pray towards the east.