Mitladgamzog is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, caring slug.

Mitladgamzog created an up quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mitladgamzog, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Mitladgamzog, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Mitladgamzog's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Mitladgamzog's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a room before entering it.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.