Zimomtgom is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, dishonest porpoise.

Zimomtgom created a strange quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimomtgom, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Zimomtgom, it will not care.

Zimomtgom's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Zimomtgom's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.