Lopbadnibnilxucgam is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, intelligent meerkat.

Lopbadnibnilxucgam created the Sun nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Lopbadnibnilxucgam, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lopbadnibnilxucgam, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Lopbadnibnilxucgam's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Lopbadnibnilxucgam's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat carrots.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not bounce in public.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. You must never eat coconuts.