Lipominpagfaghivkinhak is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, annoying grasshopper.

Lipominpagfaghivkinhak created a top quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Lipominpagfaghivkinhak, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Lipominpagfaghivkinhak, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Lipominpagfaghivkinhak's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Lipominpagfaghivkinhak's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.