Cabrillfarn is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, idiotic coyote.

Cabrillfarn created the cosmos six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cabrillfarn, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cabrillfarn, it will turn you into a mole.

Cabrillfarn's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Cabrillfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Never wear magenta stockings.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never think about archaea.