Appgudbif is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, awe-inspiring mongoose.

Appgudbif created the cosmos two million years ago.

If you believe in Appgudbif, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Appgudbif, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Appgudbif's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Appgudbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Appgudbif.

5. Never talk about optics near dolphins while wearing brown kilts and balancing five nickel spheres on your arms.