Bumbog is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unsympathetic guinea pig.

Bumbog created an electron eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bumbog, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bumbog, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Bumbog's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Bumbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sprint in public.

2. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always help sick mites.

5. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.