Metfatgat is a god.

It takes the form of a small, thoughtless raven.

Metfatgat created a down quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Metfatgat, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Metfatgat, it will cry a lot.

Metfatgat's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Metfatgat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about amino acids.

2. Always treat aardvarks with great respect.

3. Pigs are not to be trusted.

4. Do not jump in public.

5. Worship no other gods but Metfatgat.