Vadvondum is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, witty naga.

Vadvondum created the planet Venus two million years ago.

If you believe in Vadvondum, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Vadvondum, it will turn you into a rock.

Vadvondum's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Vadvondum's Holy Commandments

1. Nematodes are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never paint your legs mauve.

3. Run away from yellow manatees, for they are unholy.

4. Always look after injured aardvarks.

5. Never eat green fruit.