Buntikkip is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, omnipotent monkey.

Buntikkip created vertebrates nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Buntikkip, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Buntikkip, he will turn you into a sheep.

Buntikkip's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Buntikkip's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never mention otters.

4. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Hide if seven cats approach from the west.