Xemomtwod is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, unthinking fly.

Xemomtwod created the Whirlpool Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Xemomtwod, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Xemomtwod, she will strike you with lightening.

Xemomtwod's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Xemomtwod's Holy Commandments

1. Always help porpoises in need.

2. Never think about eukaryotes.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always make sure there are no sharks in a building before entering it.