Nell is a god.

She takes the form of a small, unthinking owl.

Nell created a quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Nell, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nell, she will send minions to preach to you.

Nell's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Nell's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Retreat if nine dogs approach from the south.

4. Do not keep five badgers in a large pit.

5. Never wear gray shirts.