Kembogkin is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, pitiless guinea pig.

Kembogkin created bats nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kembogkin, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Kembogkin, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Kembogkin's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Kembogkin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep five swans in a large pit.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Kembogkin.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not hurt foxes.