Hadjoparf Cinnurthin is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, contented toad.

Hadjoparf Cinnurthin created the planet Earth eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hadjoparf Cinnurthin, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Hadjoparf Cinnurthin, she will turn you into a worm.

Hadjoparf Cinnurthin's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Hadjoparf Cinnurthin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Never wear green stockings.

3. Hide from pink cats for they are unholy.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

5. Do not chop down trees.