Veenjopbig is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, moody squirrel.

Veenjopbig created the Virgo Supercluster six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Veenjopbig, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Veenjopbig, it will have a low opinion of you.

Veenjopbig's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Veenjopbig's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Run away if four turtles approach from the north.

3. Always help badgers in need.

4. Run away from white swans, for they are unholy.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.