Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, tiresome mole.

Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon, he will come to you in dreams.

Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no bats in a building before entering it.

2. Put Yatmifmintom Tabsagtimlad Hudcanhon first in all things.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.