Gutxinvog is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, ruthless cobra.

Gutxinvog created a charm quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gutxinvog, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gutxinvog, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Gutxinvog's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Gutxinvog's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick tortoises.

2. Always wear green.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.