Cepnurlmid is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, temperamental bear.

Cepnurlmid created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepnurlmid, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Cepnurlmid, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Cepnurlmid's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Cepnurlmid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chlorophyll.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not speak about garlic.

4. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never wear yellow hats.