Bagzedbet is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, egotistical hamster.

Bagzedbet created a down quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bagzedbet, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bagzedbet, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bagzedbet's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Bagzedbet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.