Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, smart grasshopper.

Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk created a top quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Shrews are not to be trusted.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not take Ciblincusskomcabab Jipvonk's name in vain.