Flanomtdut is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, ill-tempered human.

Flanomtdut created a quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flanomtdut, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Flanomtdut, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Flanomtdut's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Flanomtdut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt mice.

2. Run away from red dogs, for they are unholy.

3. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Flanomtdut in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always treat hamsters with great respect.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.