Zakrakcut is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, unthinking warg.

Zakrakcut created the Tadpole Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakrakcut, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Zakrakcut, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Zakrakcut's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Zakrakcut's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always obey Zakrakcut's priests.

3. Do not eat parsnips.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not dye your hair green.