Ditgofpom is a god.

It takes the form of a small, bad-tempered giraffe.

Ditgofpom created the Sunflower Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ditgofpom, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Ditgofpom, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Ditgofpom's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Ditgofpom's Holy Commandments

1. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Ditgofpom on top of all buildings.

4. Hide from indigo aardvarks for they are unholy.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.