Catjopnurl is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, blissful giraffe.

Catjopnurl created the planet Mars five million years ago.

If you believe in Catjopnurl, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Catjopnurl, he will turn you into a plant.

Catjopnurl's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Catjopnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in red.

2. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

3. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a room before entering it.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.