Baglagflan is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, prudent dingo.

Baglagflan created humankind six million years ago.

If you believe in Baglagflan, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Baglagflan, it will throw large rocks at you.

Baglagflan's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Baglagflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near nematodes.

2. Never think about chlorophyll.

3. Put Baglagflan first in all things.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Baglagflan on top of all buildings.