Pakpintip is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, thoughtless fairy.

Pakpintip created the planet Saturn six million years ago.

If you believe in Pakpintip, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Pakpintip, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Pakpintip's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Pakpintip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Do not hurt aardvarks.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.