Pidlidgon is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, sage wolf.

Pidlidgon created a bottom quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pidlidgon, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Pidlidgon, he will turn you into a tree.

Pidlidgon's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Pidlidgon's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven turtles approach from the west.

2. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

3. Never think ill of sick dogs.

4. Never mention doves.

5. You must pray to Pidlidgon eight times a day.