Flanzagnel is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, idiotic warg.

Flanzagnel created the cosmos two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flanzagnel, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Flanzagnel, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Flanzagnel's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Flanzagnel's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never write about moons.

3. Never talk about great tits.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Run away from brown badgers, for they are unholy.