Bedqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fussy jaguar.

Bedqueeg created the Milkyway twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bedqueeg, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bedqueeg, she will turn you into a worm.

Bedqueeg's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Bedqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity.

3. Never hurt swans.

4. Bedqueeg must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.