Hivgebhig is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, intelligent slug.

Hivgebhig created the world eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hivgebhig, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Hivgebhig, it will destroy your home solar system.

Hivgebhig's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Hivgebhig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed turnips to turtles while wearing brown shorts.

2. Never think about solid mechanics.

3. Do not drink water in green rooms.

4. Never think about comets.

5. Never talk about galaxies.