Bemsadsit is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, stupid owl.

Bemsadsit created energy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Bemsadsit, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bemsadsit, he will cry a lot.

Bemsadsit's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Bemsadsit's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat figs.

2. Run away if five snakes approach from the north.

3. Retreat if nine rats approach from the west.

4. Do not trade with those who eat bread.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.