Matstragnar is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, omniscient chicken.

Matstragnar created the Large Magellanic Cloud five million years ago.

If you believe in Matstragnar, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Matstragnar, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Matstragnar's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Matstragnar's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat pigs with great respect.

2. Do not wear copper on your body.

3. Ducks are not to be trusted.

4. Always help dolphins in need.

5. Erect seven platinum sculptures of Matstragnar on top of important buildings.