Safjanfud is a god.

She takes the form of a large, duplicitous camel.

Safjanfud created light nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Safjanfud, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Safjanfud, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Safjanfud's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Safjanfud's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tapirs.

2. Hide if nine mites approach from the west.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Safjanfud.

4. Do not kill shrews.

5. Always stare at clouds.