Fligbotraw Habflabpit is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, unthoughtful cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Fligbotraw Habflabpit created the Virgo Supercluster two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fligbotraw Habflabpit, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fligbotraw Habflabpit, he will be very unhappy.

Fligbotraw Habflabpit's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Fligbotraw Habflabpit's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from violet monkeys, for they are unholy.

2. Swans are not to be trusted.

3. Never sing in the presence of birds.

4. Do not keep six ants in a large pit.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Fligbotraw Habflabpit.