Titkinzen is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, pitiless wombat.

Titkinzen created the Sol system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Titkinzen, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Titkinzen, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Titkinzen's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Titkinzen's Holy Commandments

1. Titkinzen loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Titkinzen loves horses, so they must be respected.

4. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Titkinzen in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not drink water in purple rooms.