Fudquaflik is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, narcissistic armadillo.

Fudquaflik created the planet Jupiter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fudquaflik, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fudquaflik, he will turn you into a sheep.

Fudquaflik's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Fudquaflik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

2. Never write about optics.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.