Hakbegvadkin is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, capable pigeon.

Hakbegvadkin created time and space two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hakbegvadkin, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Hakbegvadkin, it will boil you in a big pot.

Hakbegvadkin's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Hakbegvadkin's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Always obey Hakbegvadkin's priests.

3. Hide from white capybaras for they are unholy.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Hakbegvadkin.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.