Febgovquaf is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, slow crow.

Febgovquaf created the Black Eye Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Febgovquaf, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Febgovquaf, it will turn you into a puffin.

Febgovquaf's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Febgovquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Hide from purple manatees for they are unholy.

4. You must love Febgovquaf.

5. Always treat sharks with great respect.