Cunpaknan is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, ill-tempered swan.

Cunpaknan created the planet Mars seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cunpaknan, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Cunpaknan, it will be very sad.

Cunpaknan's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Cunpaknan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Cunpaknan's name in vain.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Cunpaknan loves cats, so they must be respected.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

5. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.