Nartcabced is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, uncaring camel.

Nartcabced created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartcabced, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Nartcabced, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Nartcabced's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Nartcabced's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lemons to mites while wearing shoes.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

3. Never feed lots of cucumbers to doves while wearing yellow rings.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Always treat ants with great respect.