Zannuttcit is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, happy dog.

Zannuttcit created Asia three billion years ago.

If you believe in Zannuttcit, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Zannuttcit, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Zannuttcit's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Zannuttcit's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of oranges to shrews while wearing yellow jumpers.

2. Zannuttcit loves frogs, so they must be honoured.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not eat parsnips.