Quartbosslog is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, dishonourable fish.

Quartbosslog created parasitic wasps two million years ago.

If you believe in Quartbosslog, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Quartbosslog, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Quartbosslog's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Quartbosslog's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about goats.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Worship no other gods but Quartbosslog.

5. Pray towards the east.