Bemvabvad is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, tranquil crocodile.

Bemvabvad created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemvabvad, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bemvabvad, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Bemvabvad's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Bemvabvad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about moons.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not stand on grass.