Matcinyat is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, prudent mink.

Matcinyat created parasitic wasps seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Matcinyat, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Matcinyat, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Matcinyat's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Matcinyat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Run away from cyan otters, for they are unholy.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Run away if five sheep approach from the west.

5. Never feed peanuts to badgers while wearing violet hats.