Pagbestflan is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, able salamander.

Pagbestflan created parasitic wasps eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pagbestflan, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Pagbestflan, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Pagbestflan's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Pagbestflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Pagbestflan must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not keep five snails in a large pit.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Pagbestflan loves snakes, so they must be respected.