Didrulnegnul Lapmathab is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, thoughtless snail.

Didrulnegnul Lapmathab created an atom three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Didrulnegnul Lapmathab, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Didrulnegnul Lapmathab, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Didrulnegnul Lapmathab's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Didrulnegnul Lapmathab's Holy Commandments

1. Didrulnegnul Lapmathab loves otters, so they must be honoured.

2. Always help sick horses.

3. Always wear turquoise.

4. Do not eat figs.

5. Never talk about optics.