Arfmifkon is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fast bird.

Arfmifkon created viruses seven million years ago.

If you believe in Arfmifkon, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Arfmifkon, it will turn you into a dog.

Arfmifkon's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Arfmifkon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear purple clothing.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not keep nine mice in a large pit.

4. Never feed onions to whales while wearing black rings.

5. Do not commit murder.